Answer Request:
I'm in despair. I feel like I won't be forgiven for my sins. God doesn't love me. There's no hope for me anymore. I give up on my journey to salvation. What should I do?
The first thing to understand is that faith is not feeling. Faith is not in your head or in your emotions. What is faith? It is a confident knowing that something is true even if you don't feel it. It's a choice you make and a stance you take without the evidence to back it up.
Now, the above is important to understand! It is important that you come to the position of accepting it as true. So, read it again and let it sink in.
With the above truth let me bring you to one of the most famous scripture passages in the bible. Let's look at this verse through the eyes of faith, not feeling!
John 3:16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. 17 For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved. 18 He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.
Allow me to divide up this scripture and apply it to your questions and statements.
1. ---Your feelings tell you that God does not love you. But faith tells something different.
"God so loved the world": God does loves you. He loves you more that you can ever know. He sacrificed His only Son for you. Think of it. Who would ever do such a thing for someone else? Don't let your feelings tell you any different! Feelings are fickle. When things are tough, feelings tell you its your fault and tell you how weak you are. When things are great, feelings play along and tell you life it good. Its an up and down rollercoaster ride! You cannot have a solid foundation on feelings. What is a solid foundation is FAITH! You choose to stand on the fact that God LOVES you. God knows you by name! God holds you in His hands. God demonstrated His love for you by turning His back on His Son so that He could hold on to you. This was His choice. His love for you compelled Him to do this. "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son"
2. ---Feelings tell you that you won't be forgiven and despair is drowning out hope. But faith tells you that you are already forgiven and hope can bring peace.
"He that believeth on him is not condemned": This is a statement, not a maybe. God is saying that the one who ‘believes' on His Son is NOT condemned. This means that you are forgiven by believing on Jesus Christ. It is not conditional on what you have done, or how good or bad you have been, or on what your mind feels. No! God is saying that He forgives you and saves you because you stand upon the fact that Jesus died for you. That's it! No feelings can affect that. Let's read the verse again, "He that believeth on him is not condemned". Do you see the last part? …not condemned!" Its a statement. Its fact! If you choose to believe (stand on the fact) that Christ died for you, then you are not condemned, meaning God holds nothing against you. You are utterly forgiven. It's not what you feel or what your mind tells you in those fickle moments. Its a fact!
And here is something else to understand; Gods salvation is about your WHOLE life, not just for this present moment you are in. You might feel that life right now is unfair, but God's salvation is not so much focused on now as it is focused on the rest of your eternity. He saved you from eternal despair, not the momentary despair you may be in right now.
3. ---I give up on my journey to salvation. What should I do?
Let me give you another scripture,
Ephesians 2:8 "For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: 9 Not of works, lest any man should boast.":
Hear me out here! Salvation is not a journey. Its a moment in time that lasts for eternity. In a moment (by responding to the grace gospel) you are saved. Nothing can change that moment. When you get saved, you are eternally saved. Think of this; when a child is born, they cannot be unborn again. They remain born and exist. This process cannot be reversed. Salvation is the same. Salvation is a moment, not a journey. What is a journey is the choices you make to honour God from that moment on, but even in these choices, (as mentioned above), God does not condemn us. What we can do for Him He will cherish. If we fail in times, He forgives us. We will always remain His child.
You also ask, "What should I do?" Well, if you believe in Jesus Christ, you have already done all you need. Salvation and forgiveness depends on you responding to God's free gift. When you respond to it, you have done your part. There is nothing more expected of you to do in order to earn credits with God or add to your salvation! No. Salvation is a gift. It is not worked for or earned. The scripture above says, "Not of works". God gives you salvation and forgives you because you choose to believe in His Son. When you do that, and that alone, you are forgiven and saved. What you do for God after that is simply what you want to do because you love Him.
I know this is a long answer, but I truly believe that some info in it will have encouraged you and helped you. Let me tell you again that 90% or your question above was based on what you were feeling in that moment. Can I point out that 100% of my answer is not based on feeling, but faith. It is a matter of trusting that what God says in His Word is true. I have presented you with two scripture passages that contradict your feelings. They explicitly tell you that feelings do not apply. God responds to faith as its foundation is solid and sure and it will create in us a peace and stability that far outplays emotions.
May God's blessings, grace and peace fill your heart and mind in Christ.
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